Things I've learned

At 45 I guess I'm officially at middle age. That means I'll live to be 90. Anyway, it seems like a good time to reflect on some of the things I've learned over the years, listed in no particular order:

If you hear or smell anything unusual, find out what it is right away.

Meals seem to be more satisfying when potatoes are somehow involved.

Cultivate your friendships. Time spent with friends and family is never wasted. (See Tiffany)

The time to buy drain opener is before you need it.

Read the owners manual.

Don't trust Mapquest.

You can never win a political argument. However, in the company of those who have open minds, you can have some very interesting political discussions. Ditto for religion.

At the grocery checkout, always put the bread on the conveyor last. This keeps it from getting squished by other items at the bagging end.

There’s nothing wrong with sex.

When you get onto the freeway, keep plenty of space between you and the car ahead. It makes it much easier to merge. If everyone did that there'd be no need for metering lights.

The best way to make your computer work blazingly fast is to use older software on a newer computer.

Every generation of popular culture has its garbage. The garbage falls by the wayside, while the good endures and becomes classic. People forget the garbage of previous generations and that's why they think the old days were better.

Today's snapshot is tomorrow's historical record.

Never ship Parcel Post.

Always check the stove before you leave the house.

Faster, bigger, and newer are not synonyms for better.

Love fulfills the law. Love is the spirit behind all true law. A law is not legitimate unless it conforms to Love.

Love is the basis for all morality. Morality is not a set of rules. Morality is love in action.

If in doubt, call a professional.

Don't do business with anyone who doesn't return your calls.

Don't patronize a business that provides bad service, even if they're the only game in town.

Internet shopping is just old-fashioned mail order with an electronic catalog.

Everything breaks down to either fear or love. Fear is to love what darkness is to light.

The problem with fundamentalist religions is that they never get past the fundamentals. Its like limiting your entire spiritual education to first grade.

Diet fads come and go, but good eatin' endures.

To keep you mind sharp, get interested in something new every few years.

Ideology is unimportant. The only thing that matters is what works.

It is better to do right than to be right.

Simple gifts often have the most meaning.

New technology is nothing without old technology.

Never mistake opinion for truth.