They say you should start planning early for your retirement. So, while Im only 44 Im weighing my options now. I cant decide if I want to be a Dirty Old Man or a Cranky Old Fart. I can see advantages and disadvantages to both of these, but I don't think I can be both.
The DOM option fits in with my lifelong appreciation of feminine beauty. One cant continue looking at pretty young women at age 70 without being thought of as a DOM. And if Im perceived that way, I might as well live the part. The disadvantage here is that the only really successful DO Men are the ridiculously rich ones. Wealth is the only real attraction a DOM has. That means Ill have to do some serious financial planning, something Im not too good at.
The COF option has its merits. A COF can say pretty much what he wants whenever he wants to, which is appealing because I like to speak my mind. People will just dismiss my comments by saying Dont mind him, hes old. Ill also be able to get away with not practicing whatever political correctness will be in vogue circa 2035. When I make a social faux pas, which for me is likely to occur with some regularity, people will excuse it because I grew up in the 60s and 70s. In his day people didnt know how to be sensitive theyll say, and Ill get away with saying whatever I please because Im old. Unfortunately COFs dont usually have many friends in their final days.
So, alas, Ill probably end up being that sweet old man who lives in that cute little house with his sweet old wife hes been devoted to 60years. That, Im afraid, is my apparent destiny.